Thursday, August 30, 2007

Cry Me A River!!! No Really.........

SO tomorrow is Friday and J will be home again, he's been gone for over a week now, I haven't seen much of him at all, because his damn ship is always out, or something breaks, or someone needs something and he ends up working 7 days a week (no such thing as overtime) and leaves at 05:00 to return at 20:00 or 21:00 or whatever... It's ridiculous
(I feel like such a broken record)

But at least his leaves starts on Monday (after he has duty on Sunday...), and then we'll be able to spend sometime together and him and DW can get as much in as possible before he leaves for 7 months. (which is completely ridiculous, after he hasn't even been home close to a year yet!!!)

I really hate this whole situation and even worse, how it makes me feel. I want to be a funny happy person and this just completely ruins that, now I end up with a very sombre post and just dampening my day.

All I can really do is write it out and hopefully it makes me feel a little better.

I was watching this show called Ice Road Truckers, it's basically a bunch of truckers who go to Canada and haul parts and equipment to mines in Canada (they do this over a huge frozen lake), anyway... This happens for about 2 months out of the year and they are gone from their families the whole time.

The one guy has a little girl and he's crying and the families are crying on camera saying how hard it is, because they are gone and it's so hard it's such a longtime.

2 MONTHS!!!!!!!!! Are You kidding me?

I would dream to have J only be gone for 2 months!!! I would even take a $100 a month pay cut to have him only go out for a 2 month deployment!!
It made me so mad to watch this and think people are sitting there feeling sorry for these families, these guys are gone for 2 months, 8 damn weeks and bring home a years salary!!! My husband is gone either 6 - 7 months and we get our normal salary!!! Their husbands go away and when they get back the kids look exactly the same, and know Daddy like he's been gone a weekend.
Once again my husband will go away and come home to a completely different child, that will probably not even remember him. He missed his first tooth, his first steps, his first birthday, his first word!!!

I just pray that this is finally his last deployment (that's what pulled us through the last one, because it was SUPPOSE to be hi last one) and get through our shore duty and then get out. Never again will we re-enlist, we definitely saw the dark side of being in the military and it's no joke. Families suffer so badly and of course they don't show you that on reality TV, it's always sweet roses and sweet reunions!!


Once they leave, that's when things break, people die, miscarriage happens, paper issues creep up, Immigration hassles start. (oh and coming back for a death in the family, that's not even always a 50% possibility!!)

I am not looking forward to this and I think this time it will be much worse than last time... I am just trying to prepare myself as much as possible...

Alone for Thanksgiving, Halloween, Xmas, New Years, miss J's birthday, Valentines day.... Yeah it's a wonderful Life"


1 comment:

Gnome said...

Ai LT. My hearts breaks for you :-(